So, it turns out that the other weekend we were pretty terrible parents. We went to stay in Swansea with some friends, so, naturally Katie was getting super excited for the seaside. So much so that she couldn't get to sleep until way after ten the night before, which puts her at least three hours down on the sleep she needs. Now, it's April and it's the UK. It's not gonna get that hot, right? So we don't pack sun cream or sun hats or anything like that. It turns out to be a great weekend weather-wise, but still not really that hot. Down to the beach on the first day, and Katie's already flagging due to missed sleep. We decide to continue anyway. As we reach the beach, I say to Rach: "Do you think we should get a hat for Katie?" "Nah," she replies, "she'll be alright. Besides, we haven't got one with us anyway." "Fair enough."
A few hours later, we're back at the house and Katie is really miserable, but won't eat or sleep. She's got a temperature and starts puking. She's gone and got heatstroke. Her weekend is pretty much ruined. Way to go mom and dad. Obviously, we feel like shite, but there's not a lot we can do, apart from offer her lots of water, affection and attention.
There's a lesson to be learnt here, but I'm still not quite sure what it is, apart from always take a hat. Parenthood, it turns out, is exactly like they tell you. Like nothing you can prepare for. There are moments of frustration like nothing you've ever known, but these are balanced with moments of ecstatic joy at witnessing the simplest of things - like just recently, she's started to spontaneously tell us she loves us, and she recently said the word 'anything' perfectly in context with the sentence she was speaking, and I have no idea where she picked up how to say it, let alone what it means. Don't get me wrong, generally I don't like kids at all, especially babies, who are stupid and annoying. But this is my little girl, and she ain't like all those other mewling brats out there. She's my mewling brat, and she's made of awesome.
So basically, when she's suffering and you know it's your fault and was entirely preventable like this recent heatstroke weekend, you feel so wretched that basically you'd tear your own heart out if it would help. In a way, it's good that it happened. We'll both of us from now on go out of our way to not feel like that again, so it's made us better parents. Until the next time we get it all wrong, of course.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Monday, April 5, 2010
Who needs friends when you've got friends like these?
Something happened today which made me wonder a lot of things. It made me wonder why I have so many friends that I have nothing in common with. (If you are reading this and are one of my non-virtual friends, don't worry - to have even got this far means you are not one of the people I'm referring to). It made me wonder how many of them I would choose to become friends with if I met them tomorrow. It's said that friends are the family you get to choose, but frankly, most of my friends come to be my friends as a matter of circumstance - I don't project an aura of great self-confidence, and rather than seeking out people with mutual interests, I generally just become friends with the people I see on the most regular basis. I don't then select the people I like most to become friends with. The something that happened made me wonder if maybe I should.
The something in question happened while at a birthday party - the son of one of my wife's friends recently turned one. He's a pretty cool kid and on the day appeared to me to have the hairstyle and outfit of a 50 year-old. This may sound like an insult, but if you ask me the little dude looked awesome. Someone at the party switched on the Sky and put NME TV on for some background music. A rather odd choice for a kid's party, I'll grant you, but it was on quietly and nobody was paying much attention to it. The instant the remote was put down one of the other guests, who while not exactly a close friend, is a mutual acquaintance, loudly stated "I'm not having this on; I don't feel like slitting my wrists. Let's put something nice on", and promptly switched to Smash Hits. Now, with the house being full of little 'uns, this is clearly a more appropriate channel, and I would have no problem with the channel being changed for this reason. However, the person in question is a grown woman, and there is no doubt in my mind that she chose the music for herself, not the kids.
Isn't most pop music aimed squarely at a young audience? Isn't that why it's vacuous, asinine and repetitive? Once a person gets to a certain age, shouldn't they begin to realise this and develop a more mature and rounded taste? Why are so many adults still listening to this ear cancer?
I genuinely don't mind or judge you (too harshly) if you are the kind of person who listens to this, or watches Dancing on Ice, or enjoys reading Percy Jackson novels. The thing is, too many of the people I see as friends are almost exclusively into these things or similar. If I try to talk about, say, Radiohead, Catch-22, or maybe Dr. Strangelove, most of my friends won't know what the hell I'm talking about, being instead into Twilight or Boyzone or some other equally shit over-marketed commodity passing itself off as art.
How did I end up surrounded by friends I have nothing in common with? My wife generally skews much closer to my taste, and we often find ourselves unable to understand our friend's taste in music, film, art, politics and more. Should we say enough is enough and cut ties with these people, or continue to socialise for the sake of politeness? Should we retreat to our own world and exclude all others, or try to find new friends? Will I one day snap and find myself screaming "Why are you all so SHIT?" at them? Should I try harder to appreciate the TV they watch; is there a deeper meaning to Coronation Street and Britain's Got Talent that I'm missing?
The truth is I already kind of go through life not really paying attention to the majority of them, instead choosing to focus on my wife and daughter. Maybe when Katie's old enough I'll be able to influence her enough to allow her to broaden herself enough to become immersed in more meaningful avenues of interest, giving me a kindred spirit I'm unable to find in my friends. Knowing my luck, she'll probably get into Bratz.
The something in question happened while at a birthday party - the son of one of my wife's friends recently turned one. He's a pretty cool kid and on the day appeared to me to have the hairstyle and outfit of a 50 year-old. This may sound like an insult, but if you ask me the little dude looked awesome. Someone at the party switched on the Sky and put NME TV on for some background music. A rather odd choice for a kid's party, I'll grant you, but it was on quietly and nobody was paying much attention to it. The instant the remote was put down one of the other guests, who while not exactly a close friend, is a mutual acquaintance, loudly stated "I'm not having this on; I don't feel like slitting my wrists. Let's put something nice on", and promptly switched to Smash Hits. Now, with the house being full of little 'uns, this is clearly a more appropriate channel, and I would have no problem with the channel being changed for this reason. However, the person in question is a grown woman, and there is no doubt in my mind that she chose the music for herself, not the kids.
Isn't most pop music aimed squarely at a young audience? Isn't that why it's vacuous, asinine and repetitive? Once a person gets to a certain age, shouldn't they begin to realise this and develop a more mature and rounded taste? Why are so many adults still listening to this ear cancer?
I genuinely don't mind or judge you (too harshly) if you are the kind of person who listens to this, or watches Dancing on Ice, or enjoys reading Percy Jackson novels. The thing is, too many of the people I see as friends are almost exclusively into these things or similar. If I try to talk about, say, Radiohead, Catch-22, or maybe Dr. Strangelove, most of my friends won't know what the hell I'm talking about, being instead into Twilight or Boyzone or some other equally shit over-marketed commodity passing itself off as art.
How did I end up surrounded by friends I have nothing in common with? My wife generally skews much closer to my taste, and we often find ourselves unable to understand our friend's taste in music, film, art, politics and more. Should we say enough is enough and cut ties with these people, or continue to socialise for the sake of politeness? Should we retreat to our own world and exclude all others, or try to find new friends? Will I one day snap and find myself screaming "Why are you all so SHIT?" at them? Should I try harder to appreciate the TV they watch; is there a deeper meaning to Coronation Street and Britain's Got Talent that I'm missing?
The truth is I already kind of go through life not really paying attention to the majority of them, instead choosing to focus on my wife and daughter. Maybe when Katie's old enough I'll be able to influence her enough to allow her to broaden herself enough to become immersed in more meaningful avenues of interest, giving me a kindred spirit I'm unable to find in my friends. Knowing my luck, she'll probably get into Bratz.
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